As a person who doesn’t actively seek out other vegans to date and start a commune with it can be a little awkward crushing a meat loving man’s dreams by telling him I don’t touch the stuff. This must be handled carefully from keeping him running for the hills. After dropping the bomb you usually get a blank face staring back at you with one eye looking for the door. I blame this on the vegan thing but it’s entirely possible that it’s something else like my red hair and freckley skin. Nobody wants a ginger baby. I digress.
So my new plan is to avoid any sort of food situation for the first three months. That’s totally realistic right? For instance, I was just offered to go out for tapas and I smoothly played that one off by saying I’d love to join you but will be saving all my stomach space for the sangria. When asked why I didn’t want to eat anything I informed him that there was food in alcohol. Win.
Next up, the lunch date. I just show up to this one already drunk and let him know if I eat I might throw up. Win.
Then there’s the baseball game, it being springtime and all. Romeo gets up to grab us a couple of hot dogs and I let him know that his smooth operator date snuck in her food in her oversized purse. Economical and healthy. Win.
I'll invite you all to my wedding.
No comments:
Post a Comment